Food for Thought

Sebenarnya takde modal nak ber-blog hari ni.

Opps .. got my first Raya card today. From none other than the infamous Rotidua. Whoaaaa!

Tergezut jugak actuallynya. Thanks honey! You made my day.

Come to think of it. I hardly every get personalised Raya cards these days. The cards do come, but mostly those who owe me money, who are already keeping my money or those who’d like to have my money. Oh sungguh pathetic!

Thanks to the email world and the sms world, we have all gotten more adept at sending out an email than buying a bunch of cards, write a personalised message in them, lick the envelope, lick the stamp on and post them off with receipient in mind, fondly.

I am guilty, alright.

I’ve never been terribly good at keeping acquitances. I have a friend, Idham who still berates me for not calling him or not sending emails or not remembering his birthdays. Or even Faizul who seems to think that if I call him, it must be terribly urgent thing that I need from him.

Perceptions can be wrong.

I may suck at keeping acquitances, but I love them all. And the same goes to you, you and you. Yes, you too right at that corner.

I treasure our friendship, our kinship and I shall never forget you. Muahhh!

p/s kot celah mana pulak this post turned out to be melancholically poetic? Uish! Sah kurang sugar in blood.

Nak Makan Apa Malam Ni?

See!

It proves my point again and again. That point being, me Mothers will always take our lillte charges’ interest at heart. When fathers go berjolly-lolly dengan kawan-kawan bukak puasa, while we, Mothers it out with our headstrong, precious dahlings!

What about the principle we had?

If one goes, everyone goes, and if none’s going, none goes.

But if you must know. MrGart was away for bukapuasa with friends last night and tonight too. To be fair, last week we trailed him to a do. I don’t really fancy buka puasa at hotels and such. Well, first of all, my kids are not the type who sit at their seats, munching food and listening to adult-ish conversation, peppering it with intelligent anecdotes from a kiddie point of view.

No sirree!

First Ariz would sit for a total of 45 seconds. Then he would run off somewhere. Or he’d be climbing off some ledge or grills. Or he’d cajoled the sisters for a hide and seek which will end with a run-around the place, sending waiters with trayful of glasses looking absolutely aghast. And I would look AGHAST too, apologetic more like it.

People say food’s great, especially when it cost you some RM65 per head. But do I have time to eat? I’d be spooning some fancy-named food in my mouth, with eyes scanning the place trying to locate Ariz’s bobbing head. I’d be munching on some chicken amidst issuing instruction to Aliya to go fetch Ariz or run after him.

Then the Maghrib prayers. Despite the constant shhhhhhhh, everybody suddenly has things to discuss in the surau. And I mean everybody comes with me, not with the Daddy, but with ME. And I’d go apologetic again to the other jemaah when Ariz runs and hops and giggles.

So, I always get hungry.

Yesterday, MrGart asked me if we wanted to come. Rebung is the new Chef Ism@il’s place. But it’s cramped and it’s right in front of a main road. SO I’ll pass. So we had mac n cheese last night. With oven baked fries, garlic bread, kuah durian and bought roti jala.

Som what do I cook tonight when MrGart’s not around?

I Do Try But ..

A friend said to me last week.

Anak dan isteri adalah fitnah dunia.

This was a response to my explaining why I haven’t been to the mosque for terawih prayers. Not in this year, or even for the past many years.

It got thinking actually. Have I been obsessed with my children all this while that I’ve been neglecting what my religious obligations are? Have I been too consumed with the care of kids that I’ve forgotten what my pillars are ?

But I think I need to put things into perspectives here. Terawih is sunat, a strong one. Pardon my lack of better words. But I feel that if I were to go nightly, I’d be leaving my children in the care of the helper who is already with them throughout the day. And that can’t be fun. You see, I’m a working mother. I leave my kids at 7am and return at 6pm and I don’t wish to spend any minute once I’m home away from them. And it’s not a mighty long time. It’s a mere 5 hours before they sleep. So, am I being selfish ?
So, I asked Mosh Tino.

She said to me slowly that. The fitnah part is right. But anak-anak is amanah to you. And women tidak disyaratkan ke masjid. Apalagi bila kita perempuan gaduh ke masjid, dah membuatkan tak cukup ruang untuk kaum lelaki.

Dan satu lagi. Boleh, bukan tak boleh bawak anak-anak ke masjid. Ramai jugak yang bawak helper ke masjid untuk jaga anak sementara ibunya sembahyang. Bukan aku tak nak, but sungguh pelik & takbetul pulak rasanya if I bring the helper to rumah Allah, untuk bekerja. Besar sangat kah aku? Bukankh kita semua hamba Allah juga?

Nak bawak anak-anak pun, bertempatlah rasanya. tengok saje si Ariz tu. Jenuh riuh masjid kalau dia pergi. Berlari kesana-kesini. Panjat atas, merangkak bawah. Adani pulak asyik suka menjerit. Elok aku pergi nak buat ibadat, dapat dosa sebab jemaah lain tak khusyuk.

So, this is my resolution. I’ll continue my terawih at home. Where the kids can do what they want without disturbing others. MrGart can go to the mosque. Until my kids are bigger, I think I’ll be with them. They need me more at home. And meriah is not what I’m after. And I think if I go because to kejar meriah, niatnya sudah berubah.

Allahualam.

Losing My Touch

I dunno why. But lately blogging has lost its appeal to me.

Maybe it’s because of the frustrations of destruction of efx2. Further compounded by the efx2blogs which is inaccessible by me during the working hours. It’s really hair-tearing and frustrating when all I wanna do is post an entry but I don’t even see the box when I can type the entry. Just the title. Sigh!

Moshimoshi said that I should post entries from home. Maybe I should but home is where I unwind and collect stories to blog about. Home is also a hard to blog venue, simply because I will have too many people calling me all over the house. Unlike Moshimoshi I guess. Men! (jangan marah ye Mosh!)

And plus, this is the fasting month. I’d be slumped in the sofa by 11pm on a nightly basis. All because Ariz is still perky at that hour. I don’t do much reading these days too.

So, I guess I’ll stick to this. Wordpress had kinda grown on me. I love its clean and neat lines. Minimalists, I’d say.

Anyways.

This is what I think I wanna do. I’ll stick to this. And I’ll pour my energy into this again. I love to blog. I love even more to read the posts I wrote 3 years ago and marvel at how changed the world has been and how I have changed, for the better or the worse.

Kids and Puasa

Today is the 13th Ramadhan and so far so good for the kids.

Aliya has fasted for 10 days and only missing 3 days when she was sick. She started fasting when she was 7, but she has no qualms about it. Waking up at dawn for sahurs is fussless with her. Initially she would get very uptight over people eating in front of her but now she's gotten used to it.

Ayisha on the other hand, has fasted a total of 2 days. With Asha, it's the sahur that's the toughest. She wants to fast though. So, on days when we tried to wake her up with no luck, in the mornings she'd be banging her head, accusing Daddy of not waking her up and that she WANTED to fast. Grrrrr! But today she's fasting and was smiling at sahur. It's all in your head. With kids, you've got to tell me before they go to sleep, then it gets easier.

Adani has now gone off her Sust@gen but has become an eater. And she's been telling me that she's fasting but opps "I dah minum air tadi, kejap lagi I puasa balik, okay?". Hmpph! She's the matsalleh girl in the house. She refers to herself as I most of the times and during masa-masa injury, baru Adani this and Adani that.

Ariz does not fast, obviously but is interfering with my fasting.

First, weekends are hard cos he's draining me with his constant, demanding nursing sessions.

Second, his Mummy-s-not-here sensor is working overtime during Ramadhan. like this morning when I was finishing sahur with my sambal udang & petai, I heard the rustling and moving upstairs. Then a minute later, came the distress yells, "Mummmmyyyy". Normally after 2 calls, he'd be off the bed for a search & rescue. But not this morning.

Aliya helpfully offered to get Ariz downstairs, since I wasn't done. She came down with Ariz clinging to her, eyes closed and hands scratching head, mouth cebik-ed. He saw me and immediately extended his arms and wriggled free of Aliya.

He pulled my kaftan and wanted me to take it off and wear my nightwear, biasala tu, easy nursing to him. Ajak tengok TV kejap while I finish, tak nak. He insisted to go back to bed. Adoi! So, kenala Mummy makan kurma while atas katil.

Anyway, I hope Aliya will complete this Ramadhan with ease and Ayisha can fast as many days that she could. I hope I'll be able to fast throughou the month. Insyallah.

Tonight MrGart's breaking fast at the Rebung. I wanted to come too cos I know the food's good. But the place is kinda small and cramped and it's right in front of a main road. And I don't think my kids would stay at their chairs for long. So, I passed on tonight. Instead, we're having mac n cheese, oven fries and garlic bread. Need to think of haiwans, now.

Tara!

p/s I've been updating 3 blogs actually. This one, the wordpress and also the efx2blogs. Somehow I can't seem to post anything in the efx2blogs. Maybe connection is snail-paced these days. Not helping sungguh, especially when everybody is over there and I can't blog.

A Hectic Weekend That Was

Letsee if I can recall what we had over the weekend.

Saturday is always a busy day cos Aliya & Asha have their mental arithmetic classes and now Adani too has her English class with her fav Teacher Claire. So, once the girls were off, we took off to the wet market for the week’s supply of haiwans & dauns.

MrGart commented mesti orang kata kesian, dah tua anak baru sorang. Perasan! Well, nak buat camana. Persuaded MrGart to hop over to the baking supplies store in Shah Alam. Mak oii! Ramainya manusia. Nak raya punya pasal, manusia semata. There were truckloads of those red-topped cookie containers for people who sell cookies. Uish! Beriya-iya sungguh mereka ini.

MrGart pointed out the Kuih Samperit mould and said that he wanted me to make them. Errkk! Hmm. Ni kena google ni. Challenges, challenges. I like.

Ayisha fasted today for the first time and full too. Aliya was whispering to me how she caught Asha eating entahapaapatah but I chose to ignore. Cooked laksa johor to bring to my mother’s but she’s tired from the tadarus classes, so next week we’ll go there. I made the William-S0n0ma choc chip cookies and I thought they were gorgeous. Especially as Ariz was munching 2 in the mouth and another 2 in each fist. Leleh air liuq kakak-kakak yang puasa.

Saturday was also the day I pored and read the news on Nurin Jazlin. Sedih tengok pictures the parents burying their little girl. The picture that broke me was Nurin’s friend, a biy with tears streaming down his face. Sungguh sedih. Reading about the details of the murder, sickened me. Hanya binatang saja yang mampu buat begitu kepada kanak-kanak. Kepada ibubapa Nurin, ingatlah, anak-anak bukan milik kita. Dipinjamkan sahaja. Sampai masa kita perlu pulangkan kepadaNya.

Sunday was spent at the new Tesc0 Extr@. Besarnya mak oii! Ariz insisted to run around the place and akujadi gabra. Ish! Geramnya.

Balik tu, I made the Oatmeal Choc Chip Cookies, recipe courtesy of Frog Commissery in the States. I included raisins too. That night we had a berbuka puasa do with friends and I gave some to them. Mintak-mintakla sedap. Memang sedap rupanya. Perasan!

Well, that’s it. Asha completed her 2 full days of fasting. Aliya missed 3 days due to her being sick. Adani fasted and unfasted so many times, I lost count. Ariz still thinks he’s a lion. He roars at people and he lunges at people. He sondols people’s back and he crawls on the floor. Oh anakku!

A Mother's Grief

A friend lost her 1.5 year old daughter who was electrocuted in a freak accident yesterday.

The family had a koi pond and on that day, the electricity was down for a maintenance, probably and the they all had prior notice. The koi fish in the pond were thriving, big and healthy. So, father rented a generator set to keep the pond oxygenated throughout the power outage. When power came back on, mother pulled out the genset's socket with the genset still alive. Little Aishah toddled along and picked up the live socket and the rest was history.

And I sobbed and cried. It's just too harrowing. Little Aishah was so pretty on her death bed. She looked like she was sleeping. And I weeped.

Mother was beyond grief. Aishah had a 3 year oold sister who exclaimed to visitors that baby Aishah's sleeping. Too young to realise that baby Aishah's not coming back to play. The 3 elder brothers broke down and sobbed for the loss of their beloved little sister.

Father put on a strong facade, breaking down at last when the last rites were read and Aishah was lowered into the gravesite, where the dragonflies flew above our heads.

Anguish and grief enveloped the surrounding and I weeped some more.

Al-fatihah.

I’m Hopping Over There ..

Well, i’ve been hopping here and there.

Setting up 3 blogs already trying to find where best to set my foot on.

I discovered blogspot’s actually very user-friendly and flexible.

I found out wordpress is oh-so-cool and full of widgets and gadgets and I’d love to stay.

But now that efx2 has been resurrected as efx2blogs, I guess that’s where my loyalty lies. I love the community and more it’s wordpress based, so I’d still have fun.

So folks, hop over http://gartblue.efx2blogs.com with me.

Lost in PKNS

Hmmm.

I don’t intend to publicly humiliate myself again, and again and again. Not since I-blinked-and-Ariz-walked incident last week. Not after I absentmindedly left Adani asleep in the car. And definitely not after WE lost Ariz in the lift of a hospital.

No siree. I never sell myself short.

But this time, it’s kinda different.

I lost Ariz as well as MrGart.

The place was abuzz with people. I wanted to get baju kurung for the girls and since Ariz was in his I-can-run mode, MrGart was reining him in. I had the girls and we soon were separated.

Fine. Got the girls their baju kebaya and went to find them. None of us carried our phones tho. Idiots, really. So, common sense told me to go hover around the main front of the mall, in front of McD. The area was less crowded and that makes sense if I was lost. Furthermore, the stairs leading to where we parked our car was just THERE! And more, as it’s Raya sales, there’s a pony-tailed DJ there, blaring raya songs.

The girls were getting tired. We went traipsing all over looking for them and not finding. So we went back to sitting at the main entrance. Common sense rules! A lost boy was announced on the PA system and I saw the father looking cross claiming the smiling kid.

Aha!

So, I went there (after 1.5 hours of staring at him) and nicely asked the pony-tailed DJ.

“Kalau hilang suami dengan anak, boleh mintak tolong page kan tak, bang?”

He smiled and pushed a little notepad for me to write their names.

Kepada Encik MrGart dan anaknya Ariz, sila datang ke kaunter penerangan di hadapan McDonald’s kerana keluarga anda sedang menunggu.”

Ha ha ha ha ha. The four of us laughed so loudly at hearing it. All the aches of standing there for hours just dissipated at hearing such bizarre annoucement.

The announcement was repeated for 3 more times and each time, we laughed out loud.

People must think we’re such backwards people.

Tak reti pakai handphone ke ?”

Ni mesti prepaid dah habis ni ?”

Maknye la ni dok shopping tak inta dunia, sampai lupa laki pegi mana?”

Then, I saw them. MrGart carrying a sleepy Ariz with a rather idiotic grin on his face. Apparently he was sitting at some centre of the mall waiting for us and Ariz was asleep and how the heck didn’t I see him?

I was annoyed so I just didn’t answer. For all I care, he was sitting at the center of a small shop and tak pakai common sense ke ? And for all I know, he was sleeping behind a clothes rack and blamed me instead of not FINDING him. Hellewww!

Anyway, that was yesterday. Cooked soto for iftar and I thought it was uish sedap giler.

p/s Aliya & Asha are getting me worried now. Last week Asha had to be neb-ed for wheezing and last night Aliya pulak was breathing rather rapidly and coughing a bit, so another kid of the neb. Aku sudah risau.

Another Blog & Cerita Bazaar Ramadhan

Heh!

Tak habis-habis lagi. Disebabkan I'm like almost zombie-like today, I spent the whole morning looking at peoople's blogs. Even Keith's comment that he's now moving to wordpress. Hey!! I just set mine up at blogspot. Cehs!

So, I went over. I know Combi's there, and now OLAB is there and Nonah too.

And I was quite impressed actually, especially as I got my http://gartblue.wordpress.com back. Hehehe.

But I guess, I'll update both now.

Anyway. Ngantuknya!

We went to the Bazaar Ramadan at TTDI Jaya about 6pm yesterday to get some additional foodies. Last year, the bazaar was not bad and there weren't any rush. But yesterday, punyala ramai manusia. Lagi banyak orang dari makanan!

We couldnt' get close to any stalls. Kesian MrGart tak dapat his murtabak and popiah. Me no kuihs!

Well, I took Aliya & Ariz to a kedai nearby when MrGart held on to the other two. While I was busy spooning kuah durian into a bag, I told Aliya to keep a watch on Ariz. She nodded.

Once I'm done, I looked around and there were no Ariz around. *Gulp*

Damn! I hissed at Aliya and almost in tears cos there were a lot people around and I had no idea where to start looking. Images of the lost girl, Nurin Jazlin swam in my head.

I looked around and stepped off onto the roads and suddenly I saw Ariz coming to me FROM the bazaar. OMG! He must have wandered there alone and came back for ME! He just strolled along with no worries on his face whatsoever. Aliya was almost in tears too. But alhamdulillah! Tak terbayang rasanya if I couldn't find him. Rasa-rasa macam nak letak the body harness on him. Geram pun ada, lega pun ada, sedih pun ada.

Hari Ini Puasa

First day.

Woke up at 4:14am and Ariz was fussy too. Quickly woke Andes and asked her to goreng telur and some ikan masin and I got Mosh's acar buah out out the fridge. Went back upstairs to nurse lil demanding Ariz to sleep again. I swear he has a mummy sensor with him. Whenever I'm like a foot away from him, it'll beep and he'll go looking.

Anyway. Had to set up another alarm at 5:00 am to sahur and got mrGart & Aliya down for sahur. Terkejut badak makcik tengok ikan masin yang sepatutnya digoreng dengan bawang and cili, perah limau sket .. tetiba telah di goreng dan dicampurkan dengan acar buah!

Oh tidak!

Maid aku telah terfonkius. And ruined Mosh's infamous acar buah. Tapi takpe la. Benda dah terlanjur. Marah pun tak guna. So, kitorang bersahur dengan telur goreng & ikan masin yang dicubit-cubit avoiding the acar.

Wanted to read a bit but Ariz's alarm sounded again.

Woke up late at 6:30 am and rushed to get ready but Ariz came into the bathroom, scrunching face and scratching eyes. Erkk! Terpaksa buka Lion King seround.

Adani's running a bit of fever and she's been coughing a but yesterday, chestily. So since aku pun dah lambat ni, told her she'd be at home, recuperating today. The day before, Asha had to use the nebuliser for her constricted airways. And Aliya & Ariz have been achho-ing and snorting gooey gunge hingus all week long.

Anyway, I'm at the office now and we just got clearance to come back in after one hour in the Tempat Berkumpul Kecemasan.

Another Sumatran earthquake this morning at 7:50am at 6.8 Richter and the buildings shook like legos. So we were evacuated.

I felt nothing, especially when I arrived at the offic, people have started to pour out of the builidng, looking up. And I was termalu-malu baru nak sampai ofis. He he he! MrGart's office in Jalan Timur, PJ has also been evacuated and the nearly rebung-ed menara telekom.

Ini kalau semalam, dah lama kitorang parked our butts at either mcD, devi's, raju's, berjaya's or mana-mana la for foodie. Tapi hari ni puasa, so ko tengok aku, aku tengok kau aje la.

Alrighty people, need to ermm work now. Cioa!

No Visitors ?

Takkan la takde orang datang blog ni kan?

Sedihnya.

Biasala tu .. pindah rumah baru. Orang pun tak tau lagi.

Tinggala komen korang. I sedey tau.

Ngantuk Mood

I baked a batch of bagels last night. The second attempt and they turned out gorgeous this time around. The first time tu, balik anjing mesti mati punya.

Anyway, that's not even why I'm sleepy right now.

People ask how can I bake when I have 4 kids at home. Easy. 1 word. KITCHENAID.

ANd in my case, a sexy, red-hot KITCHENAID. Can't do without it now.

Anyhow. Was finishing the Memory Keeper's Daughter last night. It was a sad, soppy story and if your'e in the happy mood, leave it on the shelf cos it is so depressing. And long-ish and dragging-ish. I dunno. Maybe I'm just not cut out for that sort of stories.

Well, Ariz was still awake at 12:45 midnight watching Lion King, Nemo one after the other and not even appearind tired. MrGart has already been snoring with Harry Potter's book on his lap and eyes in La-la-Land.

Finally he agreed to get into bed and sleep and it's 1:15 am.

So mr so the very ngantuk.

Malam ni dah la nak kena start bangun sahur.

Adoiii!!

Ramadhan Beckons

Tomorrow Ramadhan comes again.

It never ceases to amaze me how time flies. Did I not just completed last year's Ramadhan? Itu la orang kata. Time's like a river. Once it goes, it goes. So need to make the best of it.

So, sempena Ramadhan ini, I want to at least pergi masjid buat terawih paling kurang pun sekali seminggu la. Nampak gayanya macam boleh sebab Ariz is bigger now. But then again, aku selalu rasa bersalah if I leave them for purposes that's not them i.e self-fulfilling missions. And bukankah, perempuan disunatkan sembahyang dirumah saja?

Betul tu. Tapi kat rumah kurang meriah la.

Tapi tak pa. Aku bercadang jugak nak buat sekali seminggu.

And kali ni, aku akan mempraktikkan makan seadanya dah tidak mengikut nafsu.

Tapi takut tak sempat ajer la nak memasak.

Insyaallah.

So people, selamat berpuasa. Sahur tu sunat, so bangunla. Aku harao this year, dapat masak for sahur. Last year, banyak Andes yang buat sebab Ariz's fussy in bed. Tapi Andes tu kurang adventurous masaknya. So aku jugak yang terer.

Kita tunggu dan lihat eh ?

A Fresh Start

Ah well!

Ingatkan panas hingga ke petang, rupanya hujan di tengahari.

Ingatkan efx2 boleh bertahan, rupanya kena phished pulak.

Dahla it's been like about a year since I moved over to efx2 from the now dead modblog, now efx2 too suffered the same fate. Maybe not entirely dead, but well, who knows.

Was getting cosy with the buddies over there and now alone yet again.

Sigh!